Wandering Willows

My eyes flutter but they do not shut. Thoughts move too fast but leave a trail that creates its own sentences. I feel stuck yet my mind feels like it's flying freely. Holding hope in one hand and despair in the other, I move about the night like a quiet mouse not wanting to sleep but to be awake and alive. Willow, a word that came from no where, yet feels so right as a title. Feeling so much at once that it is overloading every inch of my body. Not mania, maybe a hint of madness, locked away, now unleashed to never be led only to lead. The fan hums its soothing tone and his breathing is steady all calm around me but not in me. Finding my reflection I see what is that I thought would never be, and what is is disappointing and sad. Numbers play games but the mirror never lies. Deep inside I feel this tug to go back, to be in that mind space all over again thinking that it will work this time, though it never does. Run away with me to the forest of dreams, walking on clouds and touching stars letting go of the despair like rain watering the most beautiful of flowers.

Words now begin the slowly disintegrate as I try to finish what I came to say. Words are tricky things the mind puts together to rob itself of peace and sanity. Madness all around. Maybe just maybe myself has returned. Or maybe this is the start of something new. ...