Life on Medicine

Taking medicine has been a normal everyday part of my life for the last five years to treat bipolar disorder. It is a daily struggle to look at my medicine boxes and think that this is what I have to do to stay "sane," "normal," and "a productive member of society."  However, when you neglect your medicine things go wrong very quickly.

For me, right now, I am having a rough time with being overly tired and being lack-lustre, not having the mental energy to do normal household chores, write my blog, film my YouTube videos, and it takes an extreme amount of kicking my own butt to get ready for work and be in the mind-set to be at work fully aware and busy.

So for today, I decided I would ask to have my seroquel xr to be decreased from 600mg to 400mg in hopes that I will be able to get the sleep I need without having to sleep three or four hours during the day just to have energy at night. It has been very trial-some to try and fight off this exhausted feeling. I know I am getting a decent quality of sleep, but it just is mentally not enough. My brain does not want to function. I am making a better catatonic creature than a human being since I can sit in front of either my computer or my phone and watch videos non-stop. However, when it comes to reading I read a paragraph and then my mind just goes blank.

Take this as a little warning to know yourself and your medicine. I know for me, changing my dose of seroquel is what helps stabilize my moods, keep psychosis in check, and to aide in sleeping. I know that I can adjust the dosing amount because I have been on seroquel long enough to know what dosage helps during what season. For me, things change season to season. So please, head these words to take care of yourself and your medicine. Don't just sit back and let yourself be consumed by society and what is supposed to work and what doesn't. You know what is best for you. Stand up and speak to your doctor, that is what they are there for. Having a mental illness can be a chore if you let it be.

Is This A Beauty Blog

I came upon blogger when Xanga shut down. I still do not know what I want this blog to be. I do not know if I want to focus on beauty and fashion or if I rather it be more personal, much like my Xanga blog.

I do know now that when you follow the "trend" your blog or youtube channel flourishes which is quite annoying. How can you promote your own channel when it doesn't follow trends?? How can you reach the people that are stuck in their habits and neglect smaller channels or blogs because they aren't strictly one thing?

We all create our own content but how much of that content is a trend of beauty style for the month, or the top challenges out now??

Being original these days seems to be a trend on if you work outside of the internet world. 

If you aren't smart enough or beautiful enough to have a great blog that has equal content that doesn't always follow the trend how do you maintain that?? 

I want my blog and my YouTube channel to come together as one but here at ceruleansparkles I want to make my content the way I want without being limited to trends. 

There is a x button at the top of every page on the internet and one big red one to close the whole. If you don't like what you see or read, why not comment? Why not consider for just a moment that maybe if there were conversations going content would be created faster with more fluidity that before.

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